Frustration sets in!

"One who believes that he has mastered the art of horsemanship has not yet begun to understand the horse."       

                                        Author unknown

It's been over a week since my last great experience with Annabelle, as described in my last post.  I really thought I had it under control.  I knew what I was doing!  She was now going to be the best horse ever for me!  She'd be eating right out of my hand and doing everything I asked her to do!  I hit the jackpot!  All my efforts were paying off!  

Well... not so fast.  Reality has slapped me in the face!  You see, things haven't gone so smoothly since that last great day, and despite all the improvements we've made so far, we seemed to have gone backwards and she started displaying some of those old bad habits! 

I truly believed that if I built trust between us, got her totally relaxed, and got her the right saddle, she would be such a pleasure to be around all the time.  Well, just like people, horses can be very complex, with their own set of experiences, feelings, and ways of responding and thinking.  

  

I thought I knew her, but it seems I'm still trying to figure her out, and I suppose that time will help with that.  Translating her behaviors into what they mean is a bit like detective work or putting a puzzle together.  Sometimes I get the right answer, and other times I'm clueless.  Patience will be my best friend here.

So, what did she do to make me feel we're going backwards, all in one week?  She's been fighting me about being saddled and bridled and as usual, about me mounting her.  Last Friday was the last straw for me.  As I tried to put the saddle on her,  she kept moving away from where I was standing, first all the way to one side, then all the way to the opposite side.  Then she tried to nip (or worse, bite?) when I connected the cinch to the saddle which didn't even touch her.  That's when I lost it.  I felt the tears well up in my eyes, and I knew I had to put her back in her stall and go home, or I would just start yelling at her, or pull hard on her halter, or smack her, all of which I did not want to do, I don't like doing and I would not be proud of myself if I did.  So I did what I felt I should do and left the scene!

I did a lot of thinking about this over this weekend.  While I consider my riding skills at probably an intermediate level, my horsemanship skills place me as a clear novice.  I wanted to lease a horse to practice my riding skills, my seat, my comfort level about being with a horse, and to find pleasure in the activity, but instead, while we've had many enjoyable days, I'm faced with a real challenge ahead of me.

I can't forget that we've made some really good progress, but I often feel that I'm in over my head.  When we have those bad days, I keep wishing for a pleasant, calm horse who is happy to be ridden and who can take things in stride.

While I feel really discouraged right now, I would like to look at this situation in a bright light.  I should realize that there's always a learning curve to work through.  That for every step forward we take, sometimes we have to take two backwards.  I should see that horses are living, breathing, feeling animals who also have good days and bad days.  I should look at it as a way to learn more about horses and what makes them tick and as a way to work through problems with them.  I should look at this as an opportunity to let Annabelle teach me about what works and what doesn't, and I should really learn how to do things I've never done before, like effective ground work. 

So, tomorrow, I will talk to the barn's trainer/owner and schedule a lesson with her.  I want her to check Annabelle out, and see if she has any sore or tender spots throughout her body.  I want her to check out the tack I've been using and make sure it's working for Annabelle, and I want her to teach me ground work exercises that I can use to improve my leadership skills.

I would like to give this a month or two, and see where it goes.  If I find that I'm making progress most of the time, I will continue to lease her and work with her.  Hopefully, this is just a setback that Annabelle and I need to get through in order to actually move closer to an ever stronger and trustworthy relationship! 

 What a month it's been!

"A good rider can hear his horse speak to him.  

        A great rider can hear his horse whisper"       

Author unknown

Annabelle enjoying bits of grass

While I'm far from being a great rider, I have made it my mission to "listen" to Annabelle, it's up to me to translate her messages.  She's so clear to me right now, and I have to admit that we have made great progress. 

For starters, about a month ago, I took her into the round pen.  I was determined to let her decide what to do in there.  I went in without an agenda and just let her be.  As I sat against the wall and watched her, I did talk to her a little bit here and there, but not much.  I didn't want to spoil the mood by too much gibberish on my part!

She got busy eating bits of grass that had grown throughout the pen, often keeping an eye on me.  This went on for about 10 minutes and when she finished eating, she calmly walked over to me, head down, and stopped within inches of my hands.  Wow...for the first time ever, SHE CAME TO ME!!!  I stood up, petted her and started walking around the pen.  She promptly followed me, keeping close contact with my hand.  She nudged it from time to time, as if saying "we're in here together, you and me!".  Talk about being on cloud nine!!!  This was the beginning of what could be a long-lasting friendship!

Previously, during our rides, she has displayed unhappy behaviors, such as tail swishing, head tossing, refusal to let me mount, constantly biting the bit, trying to nip while being cinched, and other overall nervous behaviors.  I have strongly suspected that the tack she was using was not doing her any good, she would fuss about them even though I had previously spent time relaxing her.  She's had a Western and an Aussie saddle on.  Last week, I bought an English saddle at my local consignment tack shop, and as soon as I put it on her, she didn't fuss at all!  So, it's safe to say that we've had great success with it along with modifying the way I was doing things with her.  Who knew she'd be an English girl!

What I found was that keeping her calm is of extreme importance for such a sensitive horse. I think she trusts me enough now to know that I won't hurt her, so that was step number one. 

 What I did last week, before riding, was to take her into the round pen.  First, I let her roam the pen looking for grass scraps.  When she was done, she came to me, at which point I proceeded to massage her body and ears.  I had her lower her head, and do lateral flexion to both sides.  I then sent her out at a walk and then a trot, and switched directions.  We worked on backing up too. 

Back at the stables, I saddled her up and cinched her up ever so slowly, massaging her ears in between each tightening.  I took her for a walk around the property and tied her up by the pastures.  I then did the final cinching.  And voila...no attempts at nipping or showing discomfort on her part!!!

When I put her bridle on, for the first time EVER, she kept her head low for me and patiently waited until I put it on her!  I couldn't believe my eyes!!!

When I went to mount her, just outside the stables, she did move about a bit, forward and to the sides, but nothing too crazy.  I avoided the arena like the plague, since I feel she really doesn't like it.  We then went for a great trail ride around the property and we had a wonderful, connected ride!

My next move is to get her into a bitless bridle.  Something tells me this is another area of pain or discomfort for her.  I've been looking at various types, and there's quite a variety out there.  I can't wait to get one and try it on her! 

If my suspicions prove correct, she is going to be one happy camper!  Which will, of course, make ME a happy camper!!!


P.S. ---- By the way, the ear massages have proven to be extremely calming and effective for Annabelle.  I learned about it through the Linda Tellington-Jones method, the TTouches.  I highly recommend her books, they're full of information and they work!!!  You can find her videos through youtube as well. 

Here's wishing you a great bonding experience using equine massages!










  

8/26/13

 First Day...

                                             Annabelle and I on the forefront

"A true horseman does not look at his horse with his eyes, he looks at his horse with his heart."         

            Author unknown

 

 

It's been a while since I've posted anything, but the good news is that I finally leased a horse!  It turns out that I had a choice of leasing Cocoa or Annabelle, and I went with Annabelle, a 10-year old mare, half Arabian and half Paint, and a total beauty!

I've always had a soft spot for her.  She and I clicked from the beginning and we seem to be a really good match for each other. While others at the ranch don't like her oftentimes "sassy" way, I instinctually felt that she wasn't being "marish", but instead, it was her only way of communicating things that distressed her.  How else can she tell you what she thinks?  I made it my job to "listen" to her and find out what was troubling her.

I must confess that as a green horsewoman, she made me nervous on many occasions.  While grooming, she would refuse to lift her feet.  When riding, she would swish her tail or throw her head up and to the sides.  Many times, she would not let anyone mount her.  I was told she was acting like a typical mare!

 

I was not satisfied with this answer.  I felt she wasn't just telling me something was wrong...she was screaming it!  How can I not listen?!

During my summer lessons with her, I found that keeping a calm demeanor seemed to calm her too.  If I spent time grooming her and massaging her, she would happily pick up her feet for me.  If I slowly cinched her, she would remain calm.  I found that arena work is not her favorite but that she loves trail rides. I also strongly suspected that the saddle that was assigned to her caused her pain or discomfort.  This will be proven in time since I can now try a different saddle on her.

I'm really happy now to be able to be with her everyday if I want to.  My plan is to go to the ranch three times a week, but if I can make it more often, I will.  During this first week with her, I only got to ride her the first day.  When I went to see her a couple of days later, she had an injury on her knee, gotten from a swift kick by another horse, so I just groomed her, gave her an apple and called it a day.  We'll see how she's doing during the next few days.  I do miss her!

Hopefully, I'll be back in the saddle in no time! 

 

Summer Days

                                     Riding Annabelle

     

  “Life is not coming at you, it’s coming from you.  You are creating the life you live.”

                                                                                   Wyatt Webb

We didn’t go on vacation this summer, but I did have a memorable summer time, even in the high heat of the Arizona desert.  After a 30-year hiatus, I took up horseback riding again!  Who notices the heat in the presence of the mighty horse?  Not me!!!!

I discovered a wonderful horse ranch, took lots of lessons, met great people, worked at two youth horse camps, galloped through the local trails, almost bought my very first horse ever (the vet check proved the little mare lameL) and I am about to lease a beautiful, chocolate-brown, gaited mare named Cocoa!

This time around, I’m riding western and for pleasure.  I’m going on trail rides as well as doing arena work.  I’ve learned to do some ground work in the round pen and I’ve practiced my riding technique and transitions in all three gaits.  Every time I ride, I improve.

I’m so very new at all this, but every time I’m at the ranch, I learn something new.  Oh, yes, did I mention that I’m a research nut?  I’ve bought and read tons of books (the library has become my best friend!), gone through tons of websites and took the plunge and splurged on a set of DVDs by my favorite horseman – Mark Rashid.  I’ve researched the web for sale horses and ranches for sale – a girl can dream, can’t she?!

My kids’ favorite comment to me as they passed by me sitting at the computer was: “Oh, Mom…horses again?”   So, this summer has been all about horses, sprinkled with a little obsessive-compulsive behavior on my part, but what can I say?  I’ve become a horseaholic!

To know a horse

      

                    "Bread may feed my body, but my horse feeds my soul".  

                                                                                      Author unknown

                                                                                                

      

It all began when I was 10 years old, and finances being what they were, horses were not going to be in the cards for me.  However, that didn't stop me from sneaking into the local equestrian facility where I would hide behind a bush and stare at those magnificent beasts and the lucky children who got to ride them!

As luck would have it, my Dad’s uncle owned a trail horse business out in the country, and occasionally, my cousin Willie and I (did I mention I had a crush on him?), would ride and gallop to our hearts content!  Oh, what joy!

Fast forward to my early twenties.  Now I could pay for my own lessons and took up English riding for a couple of years.  Yes, I won a few ribbons and jumped some low fences, but I was always left wanting more.  You see, the horse I rode came to me saddled, I’d ride him for an hour, and then he was summarily whisked away, leaving me standing there with my arms outstretched to him, longing for him not to go… Oh, what sadness!

Fast forward 30 years to the present.  I can’t shake the feeling that it’s now or never!  This is my time to ride again!  I’m fortunate to have a wonderful husband who understands this little passion of mine and three beautiful children who’ve learned to share in my dream…the dream to know a horse!

I wanted to put "pen to paper", so to speak, and create a blog that would reflect what a typical woman beginning the second half of her life, goes through.  This blog is mostly about horses, but it's also about the trials and tribulations of aging gracefully and finding the road toward health, vitality, and beauty.

 It's never too late to follow one's dreams.  If your dream is being around horses somehow, whether you own one, lease one, or just admire them from afar, please join me and share your thoughts!